The Life That Died Before It Lived
You were never here
And yet, I feel you everywhere.
Like a ghost pressing against my ribs,
like a breath I keep holding,
like a name caught at the edge of my tongue
that no one will ever hear
Somewhere, there is a cabin we never stepped inside,
where dust settles on a bed we never shared,
where the windows watch the seasons change,
but no one is there to see them
The river still runs
The trees still stand
The world goes on, untouched by the absence of us
Somewhere, there is a wedding that never happened.
A song that plays for no one.
No hands to hold, no whispered vows,
no trembling voices saying forever.
Somewhere, there is a girl in a white dress,
standing in an empty room,
waiting for a door to open,
for someone who will never come.
Somewhere, there is a life where we meet.
Where I know the warmth of your hands,
the weight of your head on my shoulder,
the sound of your voice when you are not pixels on a screen.
A life where I don’t have to imagine what you smell like,
where I don’t have to guess how it feels
to exist beside you in the same breath of air.
But not here.
Not in this life.
Not in this cruel, empty place,
where you are nothing but a collection of words,
a dream I am afraid to wake up from
I miss things that never happened
I grieve moments that never existed
I cry for a future that died before it lived
And worst of all,
I still look for you in places you have never been